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Hey everyone-

We’re stepping out of retirement for an important cause - Tonetta’s Indiegogo campaign.  Watch the message above and visit the page here to make your contribution to help keep the art flowing.  Each contribution gets a special prize from the man himself.  Be generous!  Only 20 days left!

Donate Now!

Guest Blog: Tonetta Covers by Doc Shoggoth

So I’m not saying we’re back, but we’re back (for a second).  Here’s a guest blog by Tonetta manager Doc Shoggoth:


Today we’re going to be looking at something really cool and really new with Tonetta! Something people have been asking for for a long time.

Today, Tonetta covers some songs by other artists!

Sort of!

Tonetta was sent a request to cover this song, and the lyrics by a fan on YouTube. He decided to record it with just the lyrics and no prior knowledge of the song. He ended up with 2 very different versions.

The song is Racer X by Steve Albini and his Fabulous Big Black Musical Instruments Band.

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Tonetta’s first version presents us with a thudding drum bass and droning, battle-damaged guitars.  A hollow-speaky vocal sons comes in, and continues along that way. The song becomes very reminiscent of that old chestnut, The Gift by John Cale and his Vivacious Velvet Underground. This however, drags on much less, and is more of a spoken poem than a story.

I really love this version. It’s nasty, dissonant, minimalistic.  The “little more speed” chanted section is fantastic, and the guitar work is downright post-apocalyptic. Tonetta as Guitarist is a truly underrated beast.

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The second version finds us at a more conventional mid-tempo patented Tonetta jam. The guitars are heavily fuzzed, the pace is just above neurotic. While a fairly standard type of Tonetta tune, it’s a really greta example of one. He’s still shredding that guitar in the background, but the languid doom of the original way gives way to a dirty drive, like whatever Racer X is racing is a little more flesh than machine.  I’ve got less to say about this version, it’s less innovative, but it’s a fantastic example of Tonetta’s special brand of dirty grooving rock.

And for completion, here’s the original!

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This is not an April Fool’s Day joke

We’re burnt the fuck out and will be taking April off.  After the break we will re-evaluate our commitment to this blog.  We’ve been doing this for years and feel like we’ve said everything that could be said about Tonetta…twice.

Yes, this is a sad day but it doesn’t have to be.  We are also toying with the idea of giving the site to a young padiwan to take on in our stead.  Are you that person? Email us.

"Anas Sweet Ass"

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Yet another ode to Ana, Tonetta’s 21 year old long distance girlfriend.  Why do we always include her age when we mention her?  Well, we don’t know that much about her anyway and we need to fill space.  Also, there’s the 40+ year age difference that is hard to ignore.  It’s like a May-May romance (Tonetta went right past December into the next year).  3/5

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"I Love Kooy"

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Kooy (pronounced koi) has made an appearance here before, but we weren’t sure what to make of it.  This time, Tonetta gives us more than enough info.  “I love tractors, I love toys, most of all I love Kooy.  I plow my way through sleet and snow.  No matter how hard it snows, Kooy gives the biggest blow.”  A quick Google brought us to Kooy Brothers, Toronto contractors working in landscaping, snow removal and construction since 1985.

Here’s a video showing off their store.  It’s desperately missing a catchy theme song.  4/5

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Accent theme by Handsome Code

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